A Rant Too Long For Twitter


Two people I know have gotten married in the last two weeks. One was my husband’s cousin 2 weeks ago and the other a friend of a friend. I am connected with both via Facebook. And I have had the dubious unpleasure of being witness to the uncouth bamas who apparently missed etiquette lessons at school or from their mamas. People, listen up: A newly married person’s FB wall is not the place to comment/ask/inquire/wonder why you didn’t get an invitation to said nuptials!! Adding on a half ass congratulations doesn’t make it any better! And tacking on a fake ass LOL, when you know your ass was serious, is obvious as hell! 

Seriously ya’ll, on my husband cousin’s wall there were like 3 or 4 folks who asked/commented why they didn’t get an invite. Granted, the cousin in question is the daughter of the pastor of one of the largest churches in her city, but still that doesn’t mean everyone in town was owed an invite! And then the cousin took the time to comment on each of these folks wall posts trying to give an explanation!!

Ninja/bish please!!

There are a variety of reasons why one may not get invited to a wedding:

  • cost
  • lack of space
  • the need to invite family as opposed to friends
  • the bride and/or groom doesn’t really like your ass
  • they honestly forgot
  • some other reason that they really don’t need to explain to you

At any rate, have some grace and inquire offline, if you feel that you just have to inquire at all. And if you get an answer that you don’t agree with from the newlywed, don’t press the issue. Either it’s something you can live with or you can’t! And there isn’t really anything you can do about it.

But don’t go posting shit on their wall about it!!! Being passive agressive just gets your post deleted. At best. At worst, you get cussed out.

Quit doing the utmost trying to be gangsta via social media! You know I hates an internet thug!!!



13 thoughts on “A Rant Too Long For Twitter

  1. I’m going to go with this response to that question, “If you have to ask…”!

  2. Facebook is literally where couth, etiquette and some damn common sense have gone to die… or at least take the longest nap ever.

    People really don’t know how to act there and that keyboard courage is real. Like seriously, don’t say nothing to me on facebook you wouldn’t say to my face and FURTHER the simple fact that you think it’s ok to ask me such on facebook (for WHATEVER reason) is precisely why your basic self got nary an invite.

    And this is why we don’t have nice things.

  3. People really do this? No ma’am. Its called tact. I have seen where people have posted a change in wedding venue on Facebook, but asking why you weren’t invited that is a bit much.

  4. I agree with you however *some* (not all) bring this on themselves. Some need to learn to stop discussing EVERY aspect of their life on FB. Change your status to married after the wedding. (I’ve had lots of friends do this, one was a huge surprise because I didn’t even know she was dating anyone). Changing it to engaged and posting video’s of the proposal with updates of every single step of the wedding planning is kind of asking for it if your friends list is wide open.

    • The friend you didn’t know was dating anyone — I want desperately to be her. I’ve told SEVERAL friends not to be the least bit surprised if that relationship status change is the first they hear of anybody.

      I also agree that when you document your business online, be prepared for folks to think it’s ok to comment on every nook and cranny of it.

      But even with all that, please don’t get on my wall and publicly ask me why you didn’t get an invite — that makes me think you want to be publicly ignored or publicly humiliated but it forces my hand, not.

  5. It’s tacky to ask, but I did do it once. A co-worker who I was rather close to was getting married. She has a really big family and I totally understood that she had to invite family over friends. So I asked her would it be OK if I just came to the wedding ceremony only. Actually she had wanted to invite me to the ceremony but she thought that I might be offened about not being invited to the reception.

    I went to the wedding only, and left my gift with their coordinator.

  6. I don’t think it’s right to ask either. Congratulate the couple and move on with life.

  7. I don’t think you have the right to ask at all.

  8. My friends’ list would have decreased immediately. People can be so f’ing selfish thinking everything is about them. Why weren’t you invited? Dammit ’cause you weren’t……shit.
    I’m so glad I don’t share that mentality. It’s a pitiful way to live.

  9. Ppl are so tacky & have no home-training. And they take wedding invites way too seriously.

  10. I got facebook posts requesting invites in advance of the wedding. One even went so far as acknowledging the tackiness of it all, but that didn’t stop her from asking. I ignored all manner of invitation inquiries, both before and after the wedding.

  11. Hey Tiffany: How come I didn’t get an invite to your wedding? *blinks innocently*

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