The B Word

I am very excited about our wedding. I love me some Myron to bits and pieces. Those things are true. However, I have been around women who were getting married and acted like planning the wedding was their only reason for existence. Wedding planning is what they ate, slept, breathed and shat (yes I said shat). These women became shall we say, obnoxious. And obnoxious is never a good look.
So I have tried to temper my excitement about getting married with the knowledge that not everyone I encounter will give an eff  about our wedding and even if they do (because my peeps have been very supportive) that does not mean they want to hear me talking about the wedding incessantly. So I sneak and read my wedding p.o.r.n and I blog. 🙂 I think I’ve been a pretty low key and even handed bride to be, but according to my fiancé, I had a bridezilla moment the other day. Like to hear about it? OK, here it go.
Ya’ll know I am getting married at Chateau Crystale in the Remington Ballroom and that the ceremony and reception will occur in the same room. That was my original thought because I really didn’t want to have to worry about dealing with 2 separate spaces. What you don’t know is that Myron and I had been having conversations about having the ceremony at the church we attend. I agreed to let him investigate getting the church because he’s been really good about letting me have my way in terms of the planning.
What I didn’t realize is that my fiancé wanted to have an OPEN wedding and a CLOSED reception “because we know a lot of people and they are gonna hear about the wedding word of mouth and want to come.”
Uh, huh what? Come again, sweetie?? WTF??
I think my head did a 360 like Linda Blair in the original Exorcist movie.
Let’s just say there was an intense discussion with elevated voices about why he felt the open wedding/closed reception was a good idea and why I felt it was tacky as hell.
Gentle readers, can you imagine the nightmare of dealing with ninjas, er um, black people who are invited to a wedding and can’t come to the reception?? And don’t let them have brought a gift. Can you imagine the curses to my soul I would receive? The tongue lashings? The murmurs and the gossip? The clutching of imaginary pearls???
And me, TIH, would have had to play bad cop and deal with disgruntled guests. No ma’am pressed ham. I can’t go for that.
So after our “discussion” had ended (with a rather huffy bride and a highly amused groom) and the original plan to have the ceremony and reception in the same place was back on, do ya’ll know that man had the nerve to look at me and say: “You know you just went all bridezilla on me right??”. And then burst into laughter!!!!
Ya’ll know I can’t stand him, right??

12 thoughts on “The B Word

  1. Phewwww! Glad you won that battle. I can’t imagine the position you’re in having to decide who to invite and who you can’t invite BUT..yeah glad you won that lol!

  2. People cannot be so hungry that they cannot attend your wedding without a meal afterwards. I. Love weddings and wedding cake. If all I got to see is my friends commit to each other than I feel honored I got to share that day.

  3. I do think that’s is awkward at best. I guess with sending one set of invites only the truly nosy would come to a wedding they weren’t invited to. I could see if you were a public figure or having a wedding at a megachurch or something.

    Unfortunately, I have attended 2 weddings where this was done. One actually sent out 2 different invitations (i can’t make this up!!!!) which was discovered after my mom tried to point out the reception directions on the invite to another attendee only to discover she had a different invite. Both receptions were very underwhelming, as in they they might as well have invited the people they were trying to exclude from the reception. Both served refreshments immediately after the wedding at that venue(cake, cheese, veggie tray punch-spending money anyway!), then moved to a reception venue.

    At one, the wedding coordinator announced “if you know you weren’t invited to the reception,please give up your seat because because we have some folk who were invited that don’t have seats.” I am so serious-just tacky! I was a hostess so I didn’t need a seat. I guess I didn’t need a meal either because the food ran out.

  4. But on another note. If you got married in the Church that might still work. At a former job we had a young man come to work with us. He and his bride to be were both fresh out of college and planning their wedding. A few of us sort of adopted them as out little brother and sister. They were both from large families and we understood that they couldn’t invite all of us to the wedding/reception. So we approached them and asked could we come to the wedding only, because we wanted to be part of their day without being a burden. We went and it turned out very nicely. Their pastor asked if any married couples wanted to stand and reaffirm their vows along with the bride and groom. Alot of couples stood up and did that. I thought that was a nice touch.

    So i said all of that to say that an OPEN wedding could work if the NON-invitees ASKED if they could come to the wedding only. So Myron’s idea might actually work.

  5. OH MY!!!!! I just clutched my imaginary pearls reading this. OMG I can’t imagine the disaster this would have caused. You just saved Myron a lifetime of folks whispering behind his back. You know OUR people don’t forget NOTHING!!! LOL

  6. I can’t think of anything tackier than inviting people to the wedding and excluding them from the reception. So glad you won that battle!

  7. I cannot even imagine having to deal with that. You would have never, ever heard the last of it from those who weren’t “good enough” to attend the reception 🙂

  8. For the record…….I wanted to only send invitations to the people we are inviting to the reception, and let anyone who wanted to come to the wedding just come.

    The writer (I love her to death) makes it seems as if I wanted to send two sets of invitations.

    And the writer loves you too baby. Thank you for clarifying. 🙂

    • I can see how that would make sense but folks know that receptions follow weddings. There would be a lot of gossip to see where the “after party” was at! Followed by the bold wedding reception crashers!

      Glad you guys were able to work it out without blood shed!

  9. LAWD! The horror. I would have went all Bridezilla too! LMAO.

  10. I get a closed wedding, open reception.

    I do.

    But the other way around? Oh Lawd, Jeebus… yeah, no, that was gonna be BAD.

    At the reception, I would tell everyone who came up to congratulate me, “you know he wanted to have a closed reception, right?” And you can let him see how bad it would’ve been. LOL!

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