Thirty Nine

Today is the last day of my fourth decade on this planet. I turn 40 tomorrow. I’m still unpacking that in my head. I. AM. TURNING. FORTY. YEARS. OLD.

I feel some kind of way about it ..I think.

It seems like yesterday that I was graduating from college, then hustling to find a job, then moving to Dallas for said job, then hating Dallas and running back home after 6 months, leaving my college boyfriend in the process. Then I dated a good friend that I’d known since college, then broke up with him, started and finished grad school, bought a house, ran the streets with my sorors and other girlfriends, traveled out of the country for the first time, had good dates and horrible ones and suddenly I was 30. It’s like my twenties were a blur.

At 39, the memories of my fourth decade are more crystalline, more frozen in time, more focused. I guess as you get older, you want to trap more of those memories in your subconscious.

In my thirties I:

• Sold my house
• Moved to Minnesota for my then boyfriend
• Proved to myself I could live somewhere else and have a good life
• Left a relationship that wasn’t going anywhere and moved back home
• Dated an ex (for the second time) that I shouldn’t have
• Got therapy when I needed it
• Went to the Bahamas and swam with dolphins
• Saw Prince in concert
• Bought another house
• Got laid off/fired a couple of times
• Lost my final remaining grandparent
• Met the coolest dude on the planet
• Planned and pulled off a wedding for 150 people
• Married that really cool dude
• Got a lesson about who is a true friend and who wasn’t
• Saw the Grand Canyon
• Became an aunt to my brother’s 2 adorable children
• Put my feet in the Atlantic, Pacific and the Gulf of Mexico
• Supported my spouse in the loss of his dear mother
• And really for the most part came into my own

I’m sure my life event list could be longer but those are some of the ones that really stick out to me. And that’s what is so wild, that’s just ten years’ worth of stuff. Now that I read that, I guess I don’t feel so uneasy about turning the big four oh after all. It might be just another day, but it’s another day I get to learn, growth, evolve and LIVE.

Now that’s worth celebrating, don’t you think?

Odds And Ends: Memorial Day Weekend Edition

Hey ya’ll, what’s up? How was your holiday weekend? Of course it’s always too damn short. But hubs and I made the best of it anyway.

Saturday, we lazed around and had a very late and delicious brunch. Myron broke our very nice waffle iron and we had waffles, sausage and hash brown potatoes topped with cheese and sour cream. So that big meal deserved another epic nap and so an epic nap was taken!

We then got up and got dressed to head out to hang with a friend at a day party she was hosting, then left there to go to another friend’s crawfish boil. We stayed there for the rest of the evening, good eats (and drinks) were had by all.

Sunday, seems a slight hangover was acquired by yours truly so I slept a bit longer and then we got up to check out Hangover 3. It was funny, but underwhelming. Wait for the Redbox or Netflix for that one.

After the movie, we ran by the store so I could pick up the ingridients for the evening’s snack: Hot Crab Dip with Crostini. A very “savvy” Twitter friend shared the recipe with me.

Nap time again commenced. I woke up to 2 frantic messages from my mom and aunt, imploring me to come meet some relatives who were in from California, whom I barely knew and wanted to see me. Reluctantly and petulantly, I threw on some clothes and went to my parents house, where I was ooohed and aaahed over like I was an infant. It was annoying to say the least. I hadn’t seen some of these folks since I was a child and probably won’t see them again anytime soon but dutiful child duty called so there we are. I ate a burger, had some of my dad’s awesome sprinkle cake and chit chatted. I made my escape after an about an hour and went back home.

Upon arriving home, I straightened up the kitchen and made the hot crap dip, which was excellent and so luxuriously rich. It’s definitely a holiday or special occasion treat as it’s not cheap to make!

Monday, I laid upon my arse almost the entire day, with the exception of a bit of kitchen duty and some vaccuuming. Hubs did some fajitas on the grill, I made myself a margarita in the blender and called this weekend a wrap.

What did you do this past weekend?

On Mamas And Marriage

I woke up this morning and looked at my FB feed and my Instagram and saw all of the pictures of kids and their moms and I was loving it all. It made my heart so full and it was so fun to look at my friends and realize from whence they came and see them looking like mini-me’s.

But in the Mack household it was bittersweet. It was very bitter for my dear husband. He lost his mom a year ago on May 9, 2012. Yep, right before Mother’s Day. It’s sweet for me because I am blessed to have my mom still here with me, to love on and to cherish.

So it was hard for him, and it was hard for me because it’s awkward when one spouse’s parent has gone to be home with the Lord and the others is still here. Especially when it’s the FIRST anniversary. Those firsts are always the hardest. And it’s hard because you don’t always know what to say. And so I was stressed out about it. And when we went to the store to get peach roses for his mom to place on her grave and to get a gift card to my mom’s favorite store, it just doesn’t seem fair. And it isn’t, because life isn’t fair. When he hurts, I hurt too.

But my husband is so wise and so brave, and he reassured me that I need not be subdued in my celebration of my mama. After all, that’s what I should do and he was happy to celebrate her, after she was his family now too. And I was able to exhale, and to relax, and to be thankful for the gift HIS mom gave to me: which is him. And this is why I love him so.

And so we remembered his mom with peach roses. And celebrated my mom with cards, gifts, a fine dinner, and lots of hugs and kisses.

Happy Mother’s Day Frances. Happy Mother’s Day Ruthie. Our love overflows for you both.

I’m Still Here

My life hasn’t had too many words as of late but perhaps the pictures can speak for me.

We had a very good Easter:

My mom and my niece in their Easter dresses.

Miss Chandler is missing some front teeth!

Happy Easter from the Macks!

Daddy’s little girl.

It’s spring time in Houston (FINALLY) and Lent is over so it’s time for crawfish!! We went to the Pearland Crawfish Festival this weekend.

Corn, potatoes and bugs..10 pounds worth!

Lots of ducks to win a prize.

The brothers Mack: middle, oldest, youngest.

And of course, everyone loves a Carnival!

 

Hopefully it’s warming up where you are!

A Family Affair

Yesterday, Myron was on FB and saw something his aunt posted about one of his family members which triggered a bit of internet sleuthing and ended up with him mapping out 3 generations of his family tree on Ancestry.com. The site is pretty slick, as it lets you view copies of public records such as draft cards, census reports and marriage rolls if they are available.

We spent a good portion of yesterday evening talking about what he’d found out such as:

•  A female ancestor of his moved to the UK shortly after being emancipated from slavery.
• A male ancestor fought in WW1 and we were able to see his draft card.
• A great-great grandmother was married at least 3 times and we saw the various name changes on the census records
• A great-great grandfather apparently fought on the side of the Confederacy!!!  He applied for a Confederate pension but was denied. Here’s a picture of the application.

And we haven’t even started mapping my side of the family yet. I’m excited to see what I find out. I’m going to have to call my mama and take good notes.

Do I have any amateur genealogists out there? Any tips for us??

Odds And Ends: Hump Day Edition

• I’m thinking about doing a vlog for ya’ll. Do I need to set up a YouTube channel and alla that? Do I have to wear make-up? Where is the best place to film a vlog in your house? As you can see I have questions..lots of them.
• Do you have the Songza app on your phone? This Essential Motown playlist is giving me ALL OF THE LIFE right now!
• I’m eating cake right now at work. Don’t tell Myron.
• I’ve been trying to get the energy up to do some real blogging instead of all these Odds and Ends random ass posts but every time I think of a topic I want to talk about, I forget it.
• Cassandra at Cohab Chronicles links to this blog called Friday 5 for post ideas. I think I’m going to start using some of these prompts. I really want to write, it’s just sometimes the flesh is weak…and then it falls asleep.
• Shit married people do: walk around the house singing the operatic version of “As Long As My B*tches Love Me” by Lil Wayne/Future/Drake. Said lyrics go like this:I’m on that good kush and alcohol/I got some down b*tches I can call
  I don’t know what I would do without y’all/I’mma ball til the day I fall

• Yeah, we’re a bit ratchet and a whole lot of silly. But it was funny though! LMAO!!!
• Are ya’ll watching House of Cards on NetFlix? That shit is crazy good!!!
• We are history nuts so we are looking forward to watching The Bible and Vikings on the History Channel. March 3rd cant get here fast enough.
• March 3rd is also my brother’s birthday. He’ll be 28. I feel really old now.  *sigh*
• I normally look forward to the NBA All-Star games and skill challenges like the 3 Point Shoot Out and Slam Dunk contests. They were absolutely horrible this year. And I didn’t even bother to watch the actual All Star game. I did turn back long enough to see Alicia Keys crash and burn. That was vindication enough.
• How does a grown man slap a toddler on a plane, call the kid a racial slur, and be able to walk off the plane under his own power?? Shouldn’t there be dismemberment involved?
• I have eaten ALL this cake and drunk some punch. I really need a nap now.
• That’s all I got for a Wednesday afternoon. What are ya’ll doing??

Odds And Ends: The Call of Nature Edition

How was your weekend? Mine was great!

•  Friday night, hubs and I went to hang out with Beautifully Complex, her fiance’ and his brother at Fedora Lounge. Little did we know that it turns into the club after 10pm complete with valet parking. In a strip shopping center.  Doing too much you say? We thought so too but a good time was had by all.
• Saturday, we lounged around and had a hearty breakfast, then took a nap and then dragged oourselves from the couch to head to a baby shower for some friends of ours. We went, ate (really good baby shower food), cooed, oohed and ahhed and then made a break for it to go to the main event of the evening: Serious Cigars Customer Appreciation Event. Beautifully Complex’s fiancé is a diehard cigar buff and he invited us to come to this party that his cigar shop has every year. Free food, free open bar with top shelf likka and prize giveaways?? What’s NOT to love!! Here are a couple of pics from the party.




• Sunday, I was lying in the bed resting quietly when Myron came in our bedroom and mentioned that he wanted to check out this restaurant that he’d saw on TV that morning. The place is called Lucille’s and we hit up their brunch. Here are some Instagram shots I took.






• We’re family right? So we can share things with each other right? Good. Because I want to rap a taste about the middle of the night pee. Yes, THE MIDDLE OF THE NIGHT PEE. The MOTNP is when you are deep in the REM sleep and dreaming about the things you would do to Idris Elba (if you weren’t married) and the urge comes on so STRONG. Yet, you try to suppress the call of nature because you are in that good ass sleep and it’s Idris, yanno?? But the URGE defeats you and you stumble out of bed to the bathroom, in the dark but luckily since you are a girl, you just need to sit (provided that dude you live with has put the seat down) and you don’t need to cut on the light to harm your delicate eyes. So you do your business, stumble back to bed, poke your husband in the butt so he can move back over, lie down and get comfortable. And you can’t get back to sleep. MOTNP – I hate you.
• That’s all I got! What’s going on with you?????

Odds And Ends: The Tuesday Edition

• I’m really wishing this recruiter would call me back about scheduling this second interview. I gave her dates and times I was available on Friday.
• Myron and I were both sick as dogs about a week ago. Two sick married people in the house is no fun. We were both very stabby.
• The weirdest thing about being sick (we both had upper respiratory crud) was that my ass hurt. Like I could barely walk hurt..pain all in the hip bones hurt. I started to break down and use Myron’s crutches. My booty is fine now though, thanks for asking.
• The Z-Pack is your friend.
• We finally saw Django Unchained this weekend. The scene with the Ku Klux Klan members arguing over the pillowcases…funniest shit ever. It got 2 thumbs up from the Macks. Next up for us: Zero Dark Thirty
• Nerd Girl is hosting the book club over at her spot again this year. Since I was a lame and didn’t participate ANY last year, she made me pick the first book of 2013. We’ll be discussing on February 11^th.
• Taking hubs to a co-ed baby shower this weekend. THIS should be interesting.
• Looking to go to Puerto Rico in the fall. I think the 52 week savings challenge will be the vacation fund.
• We’re back in the gym tonight after an absence. Pray my strength I don’t pass out on the treadmill.
• Myron cooked yesterday’s and today’s dinner last night. Today’s dinner is going to be SO good that I’ve been quietly seat twerking about it all day. What??? You don’t do the happy dance for good food? Just me? Oh.
• I had a meeting with one of the managers that I support yesterday to make some changes to his financial model. Why hasn’t he sent them to me yet? Why do I have to chase down people who need me to do work for them? The joys of Corporate America.
• I really wish I was independently wealthy.
• That’s all I got, what’s going on with you??

Odds And Ends: The Graduate Edition

I had a really good weekend. Friday night Myron and I went to a friend’s birthday party who was turning 21 for the 25th time! LOL! Her home was decorated so pretty for the holidays so we got in a pic by the Christmas tree. This might need to go on a card!

Saturday I was on proud sister duty as I saw my big little brother graduate from college with his BS in Architecture!! I am so proud of him. He is a single dad of two (see the cheery faces below who were super excited to see daddy graduate) and though he had a few setbacks along the way, he didn’t give up and kept his eye on the prize. Now that he has that paper, he needs a job! Ya’ll hiring??

Here is my brother and my dad. That is one happy parent!

Here is me in proud sister mode. Say cheese!!

Other odds and ends that were on my mind -

• The horrible tragedy that happened in Newtown, CT has been in my thoughts all weekend. I am not a parent but I was shocked and horrified to watch the terror on the news and I hugged my niece and nephew a lot this past weekend and got lots of kisses. Parents should be able to send their kids to school without fear and I hope the President follows through on his words regarding taking steps to end mass violence like this.
• The comments by ESPN commentator Rob Parker just prove that stupidity knows no color. I’m not sure I agree with him being suspended for being an asshole but being in the public eye often means you suffer the consequences of living in a society that allows for free speech.
• What I am about to say is petty and I am almost 40 years old and should be beyond this, but I’m not and I don’t care. Last night, I posted a congratulatory message on a friend’s FB wall. I did so on purpose because I didn’t want to comment on her status and get a flood of notifications. Why did someone decide to comment on MY wall post to congratulate my friend???? Is it that much extra effort to comment on the gotdamn FB wall yourself?? Is it two mouse clicks more than you have the strength to make?? Ya’ll for real I was soooooooo ANNOYED. I have had that happen to me before and I was feeling particularly evil that day so I deleted my original post and re-typed it. Post your own damn message! It isn’t that hard! *woosah* *takes deep breaths* *lays down*

So how was your weekend?? 

Odds And Ends: Thursday Shit On My Mind

• I saw Alicia Keys on the 12-12-12 concert last night. I absolutely cannot stand that “Girl On Fire” song. She sounds like she’s been gargling a vat full of formaldehyde!! Old home-wrecking ass (yeah I’m still mad, sue me).
• I did some clean up on the social media accounts today, particularly Twitter. I’m tired of having folks who lurk and don’t ever want to interact. Block, delete, kiss my ass.
• I was reading this blog post this morning and I totally agree. Stay out my pockets!!
• Twitter helps keep me sane most days..thank you Twitter for your ratchetry.
• I hulk smashed some Salisbury steak and mashed potatoes for lunch. Do you know how long it’s been since I’ve had MASHED POTATOES??? I think I cried a little bit.
• Myron asked me what I wanted for Christmas. Like I said in my post from yesterday, I don’t know. I guess I’m definitely getting older because the material stuff definitely is starting to matter less and less.
• I am addicted to my phone. Like seriously I am. And it’s starting to scare me. I wake up and reach for it first thing because it’s the alarm clock. The other night I was asleep and I heard it beep. I hit the power button and it was only at 14% and I got alarmed because I thought I’d forgotten to charge it. So I put in on the charger and laid back down to sleep. It beeped again and I kind of got the shakes because it wasn’t charging EVEN THOUGH IT WAS PLUGGED IN. I started panicking and thinking about how I was going to have to go to the AT&T store in the morning and cuss them the hell out  cause this phone is brand new and the damn battery should not be dying after a month. But I was scared to cut on the light cause Myron was asleep. I lay there in silence, in agony!!! Then, Myron rolled over to go make a pit stop. *Glory Hallelu* I clicked on my bedside lamp right quick to examine the device. I then looked down and saw that the charger was not plugged into the outlet. Like I said, I’m addicted. Ya’ll pray OK??
• I will be the ONLY person in my group who will be at work the week of Christmas. THE ONLY PERSON. I’ll be watching a lot of Netflix and reading a lot of books that Wednesday-Friday.
• I love my husband. He is the absolute freaking best thing that has ever happened to me.
• Are you ready for some SCANDAL tonight???!!! #WhatTheHuck
• I gotta staff meeting now. See ya’ll later.